According to scholars, the Shari`ah does not require the husband to get the consent of the first wife for a second marriage. Why? Likewise, if he satisfies it lawfully, he is rewarded. I did not find anything to be forced. Ameen. I am a guy, and for many reasons I have always wanted only one wife. Abu Dhar al-Ghafari reported: The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: there is a reward for you [even] in sex with your wife. The companions asked: O Messenger of Allah (saws) is there a reward if one satisfies his passion? He (saws) said: Do you know that if he satisfies it unlawfully he has taken a sin upon himself? so tell me what are my rights? . And for most of us, we are doing the best we can. The marriage of a woman during pregnancy is also mentioned in the compilation of Islamic law and the law is allowed by weighing all its merits and mudharatnya. My husband never ever thinks or talks to other women. Great article, although I think number 4 needs to go. 4. one is in the case of polygamy he can refuse her husband of it if its in the nikkah contract. In the same line, wearing the cap (sorry, dont know the technical term for the cap), going to the mosque etc. Islamic Dua Stop My Husband Having Affairs She uses to come to wasim's gym and used to take training from him. No woman wil b happy readin it n am openly sayin out my opinion coz there aint no hadith or ayat backin d point dat ur husband thinks abt other women. It was a woman recently divorced, 4 children. Then came the third time, and he said: Marry a good and fertile woman, for I am proud of your multitudes against the other peoples.(HR Abu Dawud and Shaykh al-Albani), Another factor that allows a man to make a second marriage is due to an illness suffered by his wife. According to scholars, the Shari`ah does not require the husband to get the consent of the first wife for a second marriage. I have two kids with him and I dont want my kids got hurt. Allaah has made the wife a covering for her husband and has made the husband a covering for his wife. I raised 3 of his beautiful children. If Allah says to we, women, to sastify our husbands desire, Im really not in the mood.. It really bothers me. Bottom line is this the wife was respectful to him. Now I also got 1 boy child. guarantee that it will not happen again? A good wife is pressures, a husband sometime forgets what his got. I cannot imagine that all married men think about taking another woman. (Abu Dawud). what if a woman has more than average desire. 2 If a woman accepts that and treats her husband and the From hubby n my in-laws also. Ok guys , what I have to say has almost nothing to to with the article, and I apologize.I was just wondering what should a single, unmarrigiable women do when the desires that Allah Swt have her takes over.like I am under the marrigiable age. Islam even make a wife to ask for permission from her husband if she wants to fast (not Ramadhan fasting). And if you read all the way through surat al-nisa youll come to the part where God basically says You will not be able to treat them(women) equally. She will ONLY be cursed if her husband is angry. Women who have to stand 2nd, 3rd must be feeling a huge pain in their heart everytime their husbands go to other wifes and I believe Allah wont let anyone have such a huge pain for the sake of someone elses fun FOR SURE! I really enjoyed it and may Allah bless the author,amin. He is aware of why she is unhappy and of what she wants, but he just states that its halal and she should accept it. Hindus are more polygamous than Muslims The report of the Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66,67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the year 1951 -1961 was 5.06 among the Hindus and only 4.31 among the Muslims. Unfortunately, so many men (most traditional men, not truly religious men) use this as an excuse to be philanderers. Because ISLAM is the only perfect way of lifestyle. This will add to your familial kinship relationship. And what if the first wife becomes so sad and unhappy with the idea of her husband sleeping with another woman that she cries every day, becomes so sad and unhappy that she becomes a lifeless doll basically in her daily life. The reasons for allowing polygamy to continue, while restricting the total number of wives to 4, and placing limits on revolving-door style marriage-divorce-remarriage patterns, as well as explicitly stating the command that all wives MUST be treated equally and with absolute fairness is part of Allahs infinite wisdom, since He also adds a little later in the Sura that a man can NEVER treat all wives equally. The quran says that a man must treat his wives equally, you can easily argue that if the original wife doesnt want her husband to marry again then that is him being unfair to his first wife as compared to the potential second wife. Now they both can change that according to their mutual consent, but if there is a conflict, it is going to be judged according to the responsibilities divided by Allah(swt). means of entering Paradise, as it says in the hadeeth narrated by Ibn 4) Your wife doesnt want the stupid car, expensive phone, or giant diamon First the car then the shop, then the house. Not pretty enough. does that mean she would be cursed all night. Im not saying you should share your husband but if men want to take other wives then they can and we cannot put conditions on them that Allaah did not. 1) Respect is earned. (i.e., Ramadaan) and guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be deeds), and is patient, then surely, Allaah makes not the reward of the For those who are saying that men have no obligation to inform first wife of seond marriage. Good morning Many of the schools of thought also require a husband to fulfill his wifes sexual needs and this is not at all ruled out by this Hadith which I think some people feel it may be. . Shouldnt man and wife be friends, ask for eacothers opinion as Our Prophet(pbuh)did? something haraam. This has been described in one verse in the Quran., (Forbidden on you) collects (in marriage) two sisters, except what happened in the past: for Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Verse 4: 23), 17. After an argument or disagreement why would any woman want to have sex with the person she was arguing with? And why would I when I love my wife. It is very unfortunate that some women object less to their But being responsible caring wives and homemakers we dont act on suc impulses. Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. Any how he got chance for quarring with me. I want to marry and be in halal relationship but looks like men only looking for friendship with benefits. but after that we start arguing on small things.and he tries to hit me many time but I stopped him.recently we fought with each other n he was the one who was at fault as always. If available, get professional support or involve trusted friends that understand the cultural background. Salam guys i am in depressed for My husband he is not love me true also come with me just for sex then he leaves me he is the daily routine of his now i am 4 months pragnant of his baby he is not a truly loves me he is just using me every night i am very tierd his behaviour now i just want to leave him but i can not do this because all the problems will facing me and My baby i am just 17 years old and My husband is 31 years old and the time of My marriage life is just 7 months My husband is saying me i want a baby now i am pragnant he dose not care me love me he is only come with me when he wants sex with me otherwise he is dose not guys help me give me a advise how can i handle My husband how can i get a good happy married life what can i dooooo guys.??? i love him more than anything else. If he spends the night angry with her that means if you can convince him then he will not be angry and no angels curse you. i wouldnt state this if i honestly didnt believe it. Try to sort out the small things of your day by yourself, like your husband takes care of the major problems of the day himself, without even letting you know because he doesnt want to bother you. , Sweet advice, now i just need to find a good husband to tell him such things , Lol I feel you..I cant wait to get married to actually tell my huband these things.. :-D. Just be sure that you find the right person. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. I would leave him the second he mentioned it to me. Chances are hell like it. When you said you will send him back home Where are the ahadith for this? quickly it ends. So you are in essence saying that you are disgusted with something Allaah allowed and the Prophet peace be upon him, practiced. WaAlaikumassalaam brother I completely understand what you are saying but number 4 is nothing to do with Islam. Asalam o Alakum Please reference your sources, maybe you need to be careful what you say cause you will be accountable for your intentions and whats in your heart. As described in one of the verses of the Quran below. When we wrote our nikkah, I ask this to be added. Does he have a good understanding of his own wifes anatomy and psychology. hello I am reading your article now in 2017. May be it is not looking good for you but it would be good for the society as a whole. For men who want to carry out a second marriage, then this is permissible in Islam. fallen into a trap of the shaytaan, because he has made you attractive to If you cant except that get ready to be disappointed. U just mention everything from men side but ll these important for a woman as well. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. so only it was said in Quran to marry more than one. Masha Allah, Quite an informative and interactive forum. How to live and continue being pacient with a husband who text other women, hides his phone, go out for shishaetc. Dua and her husband are a perfect married couple in the eyes of their family, but her life turns upside down when her husband seeks her permission to marry another woman. Yes it says in the quran that men can have four wives, but it is for a reason, and the quran is written in such a way that you can argue Kays point. I wanted to ask about the part where it says if you dont have sex with him he you will b cursed till the morning does that goes out to him too.. Like if the wife wanted to have sex and he didnt doesnt he get cursed too ?? I disagree with #4. I like your comment sister and I agree 100%, For those muslimah who are not happy about the content, please remember the topic is 7 Things Your Muslim Husband Wont Tell You. As for men cam think of other woman?? I really like your article however there are some contradictions in it. So if Ur pleasing her, she is going to make excuses to have sex with U not avoid U. 2) If your sex was all that great, she wilo do the same for her. sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, not even a BarakAllahu feekum. JazakAllah to the author, thank you!!!! I was nervous the day of the meeting. In Islam, the second marriage has some rules to watch out for. They are just doing it for their selfish reasons. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. i hope this may reply to most of the posted comments regarding husband to have more than one wife. This answers the question directed to the authoR. He would say his family is who give birth to him and he grow up with Im just woman he marry. Your husband is a human not an animal. his family told him to do second marriage. Your comment shows your personal desire overpowering the Law of Allah. If it were me, its then that I would not be available for him at that given time. we have to do so. Dont use any abusive word to express your feelings. I agree with you ,u shoot my many problem.only one word I want to say thanks. How can they think they can treat both the wives equally, its easy said than done, its not possible to love the wives the same. His wife was to me, the woman that I could not be and I will be forever grateful for that. If the wife has a genuine reason for not meeting the husbands needs then she will be forgiven inshaAllah. You may want to read aboutQuranic Dua for Diseases, A woman sometimes experiences pain, menstruation, and childbirth. It has to be earned. 1. if you study Islam truthfully you will know u need to ask first. Another point is that actually polygamy can lift the burden of responsibility the woman have towards their husbands and gives her more freedom. looking at women is natural and unsinnful is just YOUR THINKING AND NOT ALL MENS. Other women and couldnt wait to taste a man as well he told me about, that he desires men too. I appreciate your responses! Above All, He Desires Your Respect and dont let someone walk over you. I dont have my parents connection.. so I dont have any moral support. Western culture encourages husbands and wives to talk to each other and discuss things. Why do you think men work so hard to make money? If a man takes a second wife through lust, this goes against Islamic teaching. I pray Allaah helps you and others in situations like yours. But it must be received and acted upon, no excuses. I think since you do not really get to know a person until you live with them, then the wife should have the opportunity to get to know and be comfortable with her new life before intimacy. I find it very perverse. Krishna had several wives. From what I was taught, the reference of a woman refusing her husband is to discourage women from playing sex games with her husband, i.e. Almost at the same time as that of mastani two more women had also joined them to take the training from wasim, they were nadima and noor. There are more than 100 comments about polygamy and everyone wants to put their input. He is a man and capable of anything. JazakhAllah khyr this was very true an helpful. husband and has made the husband a covering for his wife. As in one of the hadith below is one of the stories how the Prophet SAW fair to his wives. Sad to say, many many Muslim men are horrible examples of men, fathers and husbands. Intention to worship and remember Allah taala. Can someone please answer this question for me, preferably an already married woman or already married man? according to islam wat is the solution for this? 5. You, as men should be fair to the first wife and the second wife you will marry later. He probably cheated on you because you didnt fulfill his sexual desires so he left you in the dust. Allaah has made the wife a covering for her Jazakum Allah khayran. She cries every time they have intercourse and are intimate. DONT EXPECT RESPECT. The unending complaints of adultery, abuse and bad behavior is considered normal these days. And we do need your support.And its very troubling to be married to a woman who may not be around when the going gets tough.If you are constantly threatening divorce or separation or Khula (Islamic divorce initiated by the wife), you can expect your marriage to fizzle out very quickly. I pray to Allah Taaalaa that he gives us all the understanding of how a true Muslim should behave and that he forgives us all for all the wrong we have done in life, allowing us to die with strong Imaan and in the end enter us into Jannatul Firdaus. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". else who is also married or not married? of a martyr. This hadeeth was classed as daeef (weak) by al-Albaani in Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Prince charming!!! In the same chapter i.e. Being a woman and knowing tons of other women I know when respect is given and there is lots of communication, the man will get whatever he wants, trust me on that. I met a Muslim man three years ago. Thirdly, make active steps to change your life for the better and live in a way according to what Allah asks of you and this is better for you and your happiness. The mind is what you will live with for fifty years. You mean rapeee!??? Muslim husbands are very often (not always) reluctant to talk about certain things with their wives. Informative article. Your dream is a premonition for a memory and brain power. And if a sister gives him her all, it is duty of a man to be honest always. This article is so sexist its hilarious. He explained that no matter what he will try his best, but if he ends up finding a 2nd wife he mentioned that he would never leave me and take on the responsibilities as a husband and father and never leave my side.i am just so dumbfounded about all this, i know that forever is long.i just dont know what to think of iti am glad i read your post though, it has got me thinking, but i am still in the clouds about iti am a christian, and i dont know whether i should stay in this relationship or just call it quits..i do love him with all my heart, i am just a bit hesitant on the other 2nd person if ever that comes to pass, he said he will try his best, but what if it does happen, is the question. At least sisters are ambitious ,take their deen seriously and the roles seriously. Thanks. I am a revert alhomdolillah and married to an incredible Muslim man. I spoke about this in my article Love or Respect: Which Do You Prefer?. Shall I divorce him. The way the Prophet did fair to his wives, Rasulullah SAW, we know that Rasulullah SAW has more than one wife. Where are the unending advices to men about the dangers of treating their wives like property, second class citizens or servants? We married in the Church about a year before our baby was born. It is tge complete right of a woman if she doesnt want to live with his husband afterwards. While it is completely understandable that you are shocked and hurt, provided the situation, you may still have the chance to improve your family life with him in South Africa and keep it separate from his parents and wife in Egypt. We need to understand the depth of the issue. If you feel something wrong then do some research on that topic and InshaALLAH you will obviously get your answer. Polygamy was a social welfare for them. interests and desires? A man is the leader of the house. They also have a duty towards each other and must be . He is masha Allah an amazing husband most of the times, cooks, cleans, provides for me, helps me, gives me affection, doesnt expect nothing from me gives me freedom, but when he is annoyed he becomes agressive, really bad, doesnt want me to talk or see me, and i try to talk to solve the probl3ms he just wants to pretend it never existed. She took my hand and with tears in her eyes said: This is very hard for me, but I hope that we can be sisters her words broke my heart. I would say some of the sisters plz know the different between yr opinion and the prove of the hathis or the quran, what you think doesnt matter what matter is what allah say. Finally, it may indicate that you are committed to the relationship between your husband and his sister-in-law. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. No man likes sharing his woman or losing her to another man. man destroy your life and your family. Surely a Muslim husband would be accommodating and respectful of his wife in full I am again into depression and dont know what to do. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife. therefore he may likely to love d one who shows much respect most. When I came to know about this that girl got a girl child. You may want to read aboutSincere Islamic Ways to Treat Your Wife. I have 5 years old boy child. My husband gets alot of inbox messages from facebook from different women all the time. So first, polygamy is rule made by Allah and you have to accept it. assalam o alaikum, SUBHAN ALLAH thank u bro for sharing such a nice and meaning full message, very good job,JAZAK ALLAH,,,,,,,,and pray for me m searching a bride for me. this young man will treat you as nicely after marriage as he does now? Never! In Islam, marriage is a civil contract. its really really nicely you explained thanks for the post may ALLAH give you the reward. Why is she told to be patient and only concentrate on her aakhira and ask Allah for sabr and endurance and try to behave well, even better than before to her husband so as not to lose her place in his heart or in his life? Even I agree with it, wat do u hav to say for this.? When I met her, she was a person, a woman like me. Sorry to hear what your husband does but believe me every single Muslim husband is not same.i saa muslim husband respect thier wifes and help them when they need so please do not think negative about islam .islam is really wide about womens right if you get chance study quran or islamic book .thanks fe-aman-Allah, I am working woman, my husband is also posess good job, alhamdu lillah wealth, but since15 years iam living with my inlaws,my inlaws r very stubborn and torchering me, i am asking for seprate house but not ready . Please find all facts on islamweb.net I always go by them but Quran is key we have to read and understand.. on a personal note I would not except either but for sure would let him marry without any issue and say goodbye: remember how did he find this second wife by lowering his gaze ? This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. It takes two to tango and it sounds like you dont like dancing so he finds other people who do. To put him back on track, just reduce your level of love to the minimum level which is your duty, and he will do everything to get you and that extra love and care back I dont mean sex only, by Love. It doesnt mean hes fantasizing about another woman. Hmmmm. Salamualaikum wa rahmatuLlahi wa barakatuh. So that really shows how big a mans right is in this issue. and trial for her, and if she bears that with patience she will have the reward mentioned, but al-Tabaraani narrated from Ibn Masood that the Astagfirullah Allah forgive us all ameen. Eve Dream Explanation A woman seeing Eve in her dream: (1) Will make her husband unhappy and give him worries for befriending unworthy persons. Men are just not that good at showing emotion (unless were talking sports or politics). 6. 3.If this young man were to get Honestly the muslim women today are taking theri commitments way more seriously than the brothers. May Allah bless us with good husbands.

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