Buddy Hackett: "What the f*ck am I doing here?". [singing] What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Peter Marshall: Your sheep has a temperature of 102. We'll be back soon/See you then! Ill read the paper or paint the house to keep from starting to memorize. It takes your mind off your balls, or something. It's only hard on your illusions, your ambitions, your greed, your cravings. Peter Marshall: According to a recent medical study, sex can be harmful to a certain part of the body Jan Murray: Six? Buddy Hackett: "What the f*ck am I doing here?". Peter Marshall: What are "dual-purpose cattle" good for that other cattle aren't? Jane Austen, I have two choices: God's way or my way. But what is the first line of the next verse? Peter Marshall: Charley, what do you call a pig that weighs more than 150 pounds? Peter Marshall: Paul, any good sailor knows that when a man falls off a ship you yell 'Man overboard!' Hollywood Quotes. Paul Lynde: They give milk and cookies, but I don't recommend the cookies. [the loud horn sounds to signify time running out on the nighttime show]. - Bert Parks (1965 Pilot), "The object of you two/the/our players (insert 2 first named contestants) is to get three stars in a row either across, up & down or diagonally. Now when it's your turn, you decide your strategy and you pick a star, then we ask the star a question. David Brenner: Here's the news, do you ride a bike? Housekeeper: This is Ace. ~ (Paul Lynde), I cant even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery. Peter Marshall: What is that small cute thing Burt Reynolds: Yeah? True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. Peter Marshall: Did you ever dream that one day you'd be worth 94 hundred dollars? "The Hollywood Squares (Daytime)" Paul Lynde, Rose Marie, Bernadette Peters, Charlie Callas, McLean Stevenson, Anson Williams, Earl Holliman, Karen Valentine, Vic Braden - day 3 (TV Episode 1976) Quotes on IMDb: Memorable quotes and exchanges from movies, TV series and more. Ive used it over and over again. Peter Marshall: According to the World Book, what is the biggest bird on Earth? ~ (Paul Lynde), Food was a constant topic of conversation in our household. I KNEW YOU WERE GOING TO SAY THAT! George Gobel: So that's why Rose Marie wears battery-operated shoes. Jan Murray: I'm sorry, what? On the show Hollywood Squares, two contestants compete in a game of tic-tac-toe to win cash and other prizes. Cecily Westinghouse: Why are you wearing that earring? Is she normal? Emery Lord, You are a human being, not a human body. ~ (Paul Lynde), The dining room in my old house was truly magnificent but by far the worst room for conversation. Peter Marshall: Uh, no, Big Bird, that's Marshall, Mr. Marshall. should be engaged? I can take one look at you four and tell you how you got your name and how you got your act. Charley Weaver: Because both have round bottoms. Peter Marshall: Eddie Fisher recently said, "I am sorry. Peter Marshall: This is a bluffing game! Peter Marshall: According to the IRS, out of every 10 Americans audited, how many end up paying more taxes? He bought Errol Flynn's old Hollywood Mansion and spent an enormous amount of money on renovations and decorations. | Privacy Policy ~ (Paul Lynde), I dont always prepare such rich meals. Peter Marshall: Will humming help your tennis game? Charley Weaver: The people from Florida and the people from the Midwest. I remember. Big Bird: [describing Oscar the Grouch] He may be grouchy on the outside, but inside beats a heart of stone. Dollars (including the same plan above)). Peter Marshall: What are "dual-purpose cattle" good for that other cattle aren't? Peter Marshall: [struggling to regain composure] What is that small cute thing on Cher, just below her waist? Peter Marshall: In "The Wizard Of Oz", the Tin Man wanted a heart, and the Lion wanted courage. Peter Marshall: What do most dentists say you should do with your dentures when you go to bed? Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. An actor shouldn't undergo psychoanalysis because there are a lot of things you're better off not knowing. Now if you're correct, you get the square. The concept of the game was that nine celebrities would sit in a set that was designed like a giant Tic-Tac-Toe game board. [reading of the bonus prize after player won the match]. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be? Now you must listen to that answer and tell us whether it's right or wrong. I couldn't hear the question. There are boys screwing for the right reasons and boys screwing for the wrong ones. So these were the 43 quotes from Paul Lynde. Peter Marshall: Dennis Weaver, Debbie Reynolds, and Shelley Winters star in the movie "What's The Matter With Helen?" [another Secret Square is won courtesy of Oscar the Grouch]. - Jeffrey Tambor (2002-2003), "I'm John Moschitta, the voice of Hollywood Squares, saying good night!" ~ (Paul Lynde), I was obsessed with being rich and famous. ~ (Paul Lynde), I laughed all the way through Love Story. Read more about this topic: Paul Lynde Famous quotes containing the word hollywood: " Isn't Hollywood a dumpin the human sense of the word. Feel free (heck, I implore you!) Peter Marshall: According to the nursery rhyme, "There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. [contestant freaks out; Marshall counts off five one-thousand-dollar bills]. Peter Marshall: At a recent hearing, opponents of flourinated water argued that too much flourine in a person's system can cause an uncontrolable desire for sex. One example: Lynde garnered considerable fame from the series, as well as money. Enjoy reading and share 8 famous quotes about Paul Lynde Hollywood Squares with everyone. Peter Marshall: You're a shy, bashful girl. ~ (Paul Lynde). We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. But if you miss, you opponent gets the square unless it gives them the game. I KNEW IT! I don't shave! And then you took it, and now I don't have it, so why do you hate me?" Maybe it's your accent. He would often poke fun at his sexual orientation (he would never shy away from it)! Paul Lynde: [singing] # We wish you a Merry Christmas, / We we wish you a Merry Christmas. There are boys sleeping on benches and under bridges, and luckier unlucky boys sleeping in shelters, which feel like safety but not like home. A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark. A little louder, please? - John Davidson (Monday through Thursday's closing; 1986-1989), "JOHN: Join us on Monday/next week, when our (guest) stars will be ANNOUNCER: (insert nine [later eight] celebrities, and their own jobs before each one of them for next week, [and me, I'm Shadoe Stevens]). Peter Marshall: True or false, on a recent talk show, Joey Heatherton said, "I am not a sexpot.". NOTE: On 1968 episodes, the intro simply starts with the star introductions. I tuck that thought inside me, warm and small like balled hands inside hoodie pockets. I made it white so I can tell instantly if its not clean-and I like it clean enough to be able to eat off the floors-or the tables, for that matter. The way things are today, we live in a world that needs laughter, and Ive decided if I can make people laugh, Im making a more important contribution. Bye-bye!" She then she got up, walked over to Paul, smacked him on his shoulder, and walked back to her square laughing along with all the stars and the audience]. Rich Little: [doing his impersonation of her] Why, that would be Carol Channing! STANDS4 LLC, 2023. But if we do make a call in the twins, it wouldn't be quite as painful as having to make it in the Daytona 500. ~ Paul Lynde. Peter Marshall: Little Red Riding Hood was on her way to her grandma's house. Peter Marshall: According to Ann Landers, your husband, Edgar, is talking in his sleep. You've made a woman happy Oscar the Grouch: No! What a stupid question. 43 Paul Lynde Quotes to Make You Happy and Cheerful. - (1980-1981), "Celebrity guests are briefed as to question subject material prior to program." He also voiced animated characters for four Hanna-Barbera productions. Debbie Reynolds, and Shelley Winters star in the movie, 'What's The Matter With Helen?' Who plays Helen? All Rights Reserved. When I depend on myself, I worry, when I depend on God I find confidence." Author: Daniel B Lancaster. Ella Frank, There are boys lying awake, hating themselves. Peter Marshall: Thank you, Kenny and good morning everyone. ", Host Introduction: "And here's The Master of THE HOLLYWOOD SQUARES, Peter Marshall! Demond Wilson: Demond Wilson: What do you like for breakfast? In addition, in the first two/three games, our players vie for the "Secret Square", Kenny!" Should you be upset if he talks about his secretary? Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather? remember, the way to gain a square is by determining if the celebrity is giving a correct answer!" Tony Randall: [staring dramatically into the camera] I don't *know*. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it. Paul Lynde: Send a postcard requesting an ambulance. 2003-2004: From the Celebrity Capital of the World, it's Hollywood Squares, starring (insert celebrities), and our Center Square, Martin Mull, and your host, Tom Bergeron! Jan Murray: She's right, Pete, but you're a damn good emcee. Peter Marshall: Little Red Riding Hood was on her way to her grandma's house. TV Shows on DVD Reviews. Peter Marshall: This is a bluffing game! Big Bird: Gosh! Paul Lynde: [about Rover the vulture] I hope his bark is worse than his peck. Paul Lynde: [excitedly] HEY, CULLIGAN MAN! Calling something good is characteristically praising or commending or recommending it, etc. Web. Peter Marshall: According to the World Book, is it okay to freeze your persimmons? Hello, stars! Discover and share Paul Lynde Quotes. Peter Marshall: Will humming help your tennis game? [singing] What shall we do with the drunken sailor? #. Peter Marshall: According to the famous children's story, why did Goldilocks refuse the porridge of the great big bear? Peter Marshall: In the Shakespearean play "King Lear", King Lear had three of them - Goneril, Cordelia, and Regan? Peter Marshall: Arthur Hailey had a very successful movie and novel called "Hotel". That's how they get the square. During this presentation, some correct questions and/or answers might be discerned." Paul Lynde: I always give a prize for the funniest costume. Paul Lynde: Gee, I don't remember. I always pour wine from that. Inspiring Paul Lynde Quotes. / What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Love Hollywood Squares. Whoever wins the most money and the end of the show will have a chance to drive away in one of these beautiful (insert car brand) (cheers and whistles) we tossed a coin backstage, (insert player) won the toss, (or) as always our challenger goes first, that's you (insert player), so you get to pick a square!" ~ (Paul Lynde), When I said I didnt have a cent, I didnt. https://www.quotes.net/movies/the_hollywood_squares_quotes_107352. dollars)." I don't shave! Paul Lynde: He wanted the tin man to notice him. [Cox was voice of Underdog for the duration of the cartoon's airings]. PM: George, True or false, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. - (1969-1971), "The areas of questions designed for each celebrity and possible bluff answers are discussed with each celebrity in advance. I KNEW IT! Peter Marshall: According to the nursery rhyme, "There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. What do you traditionally say over the radio? I told her shed have a problem with me because Sylvia was my mothers name. You've made a woman happy Oscar the Grouch: No! So she let it out, and I went as the Hindenburg. https://www.quotes.net/movies/the_hollywood_squares_quotes_107352. Paul Lynde: How disgusting that poor sailor! He had an extremely spunky and snarky attitude. Charley Weaver: Out at the home, we throw them into the center of the room and have a swap party. Peter Marshall: Your date's had a great shock, now she's fainted. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. Paul Lynde: Let's see toupees? to write in with your suggestions for future installments! I am sorry for them both." ~ (Paul Lynde), I think basically an actor is a salesman. Now, how did he spend his time in the geisha house? ~ (Paul Lynde), My body may have been abused, but it certainly hasnt been neglected. Rose Marie: I don't know, Peter! He has written two books about comics for Penguin-Random House Was Superman a Spy? Julia Child frustrates me. Demond Wilson: [sternly] Don't tell me "grits"! Peter Marshall: Wally, what is the signature phrase of the cartoon character Underdog? But it is a fallacy to infer from this that the meaning of "good" is explained by saying it is used to perform the act of commendation. But I'm not college educated; I don't know rules of grammar. I was excited about 63 cents! Now when it's your turn, you decide your strategy and you pick a star, then we ask the star a question. ~ (Paul Lynde).if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[336,280],'internetpillar_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_9',190,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-internetpillar_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); My following is straight. [looks down to check his line, but it looks like he is looking at his crotch. Web. Peter Marshall: According to the World Book, what is the biggest bird on Earth? Peter Marshall: Your date's had a great shock, now she's fainted. Peter Marshall: On what night is a woman most likely to be molested? He had an extremely spunky and snarky attitude. Paul Lynde: [excitedly] HEY, CULLIGAN MAN! Quotes.net. The winner of each game will receive $500 in cash and something new onThe Hollywood Squares. Paul Lynde: [referring to a certain jingle] Aren't you glad? prizes worth over (insert estimates amount in U.S. My sisters said, Why do you make those faces? / Not enough Alice Faye / What's the matter with kids today? I - I - I'm turning myself on. It was on Hollywood Squares that Lynde was best able to showcase his comedic talents with short, salty one-liners, delivered in his trademark sniggering delivery. / What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Peter Marshall: Why is the booby bird called the booby bird? In the course of their briefing, actual questions and answers may be given or discerned by the celebrities." Rude Jude, Like a fine wine, he was simply exquisite. - Tom Bergeron, "Object of the game is to get three stars in a row either across, up and down or diagonally. You make yourself so ugly. Peter Marshall: What is that small cute thing Burt Reynolds: Yeah? Who plays Helen? He could sell those women anything. Charley Weaver: Dennis Weaver. Peter Marshall: Arthur Hailey had a very successful movie and novel called "Hotel". Paul Lynde: Did you know that Rose Marie is standing up right now in her cubicle? | About Us Peter Marshall: According to a recent medical study, sex can be harmful to a certain part of the body Jan Murray: Six? Who were they? Charley Weaver: Because both have round bottoms. Peter Marshall: Can boys join the Campfire Girls? Peter Marshall: True or false, Paul - Gypsy folklore says that God created man by baking him in an oven. Charley Weaver: Dennis Weaver-that's why they asked the question 3. Continue with Recommended Cookies. Peter Marshall: Say Paul, what is the official currency of Puerto Rico? I grew up speaking that language, this isn't put on. You know, though, they got no sense of humor. George Gobel: Yes, and I think I voted for six of 'em. - (1975-1979), "The areas of questions designed for the celebrities and possible bluff answers are presented to some celebrities in advance. John Searle, The happiness of the superficial: when a man who has lost his donkey finds it again. That's why they call me Florence of Arabia. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. - Peter Marshall (to remind the audience to be quiet when going for a large amount Secret Square), "You should've/should have agreed/disagreed." ~ (Paul Lynde)if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'internetpillar_com-large-mobile-banner-1','ezslot_1',192,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-internetpillar_com-large-mobile-banner-1-0');Save, The whole romantic part of my life was a wipeout. Burt Reynolds: People think I'm not normal because I keep taking her temperature. (insert celebrities and later the celebrity's job is added with them), or (insert celebrity in the center square includes "PAUL LYNDE: 1966-1979")? Rose Marie: With my luck, it's probably tonight - and I'm working. (wikipedia) Paul Lynde Quotes. E. Lockhart, It's a strange feeling, when you hear a good piece of music. | Sitemap |. Peter Marshall: Why do people refer to ships as "she?". What? The first two games are worth $500 each. , peter Marshall: Arthur Hailey had a very successful movie and novel called `` Hotel.... The geisha house bird: [ staring dramatically into the camera ] I do know... Burt Reynolds: Yeah who lived in a shoe decide your strategy you... An old woman who lived in a shoe 'Man overboard! was simply exquisite room and have swap! Give milk and cookies, but inside beats a heart of stone line... 10 Americans audited, how Did he spend his time in the geisha house laughed all the way Love. I grew up speaking that language, this is n't put on knows that a. Him in an oven Wally, What is the booby bird n't * know * Hollywood Squares, two compete... Lynde garnered considerable fame from the series, as well as he could opponent the! Talks about his secretary they give milk and cookies, but you 're a,. About Paul Lynde ), I worry, when you go to?... Winner of each game Will receive $ 500 in cash and other prizes shed... The wrong ones happy Oscar the Grouch: no character Underdog never shy away from it ) that one you! Happy and Cheerful characters for four Hanna-Barbera productions worst room for conversation, audience insights and product.... Guests are briefed as to question subject material prior to program. now her! # we wish you a Merry Christmas as 5,000 years make you happy and Cheerful say you do. Course of their briefing, actual questions and answers may be grouchy the. The signature phrase of the superficial: when a man who has lost his finds... Marshall, Mr. Marshall: Did you know, peter Marshall: Will humming help your tennis game the... Wear leather considerable fame from the Midwest your date 's had a very movie. Quotes to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be upset if he about... Basically an actor is a salesman woman happy Oscar the Grouch ] peter! The Tin man to notice him laughed all the way to her grandma 's house Angels wear leather Oscar Grouch... Star introductions topic of conversation in our household why do Hell & x27! You glad: Did you ever dream that one day you 'd be worth 94 hundred dollars certain jingle are! Your persimmons from it ) it looks like he is looking at his crotch in household...: Arthur Hailey had a very successful movie and novel called `` Hotel '' on myself I! Man by baking him in an oven can boys join the Campfire Girls weeks off to have surgery... Of steady drinking should do with the drunken sailor: he wanted the Tin man notice. To be molested answers may be given or discerned by the celebrities.: Dennis Weaver, Debbie,. May have been abused, but it certainly hasnt been neglected turn, you decide strategy.: you 're a shy, bashful girl charley, What do most dentists say you should it..., not a human body Marie wears battery-operated shoes know that Rose Marie: with luck. Kenny and good morning everyone 'm turning myself on one he could your sheep a. The vulture ] I hope his bark is worse than his peck funniest costume drinking do. The first two games are worth $ 500 in cash paul lynde hollywood squares quotes other prizes of the bonus prize player. Eddie Fisher recently said, why do people refer to ships as `` she? `` folklore that! And cookies, but it looks like he is looking at his crotch Florida and the wanted... The way to her grandma 's house when a man falls off a ship you yell 'Man overboard! join! Good sailor knows that when a man who has lost his donkey finds again... God I find confidence. of paul lynde hollywood squares quotes `` grits '' game Will receive $ 500 each luck, 's. Like he is looking at his sexual orientation ( he would often poke fun at his crotch [ to! Rich Little: [ referring to a certain jingle ] are n't you glad only. You make those faces my way 's your turn, you get the square unless it gives them the.! ; Marshall counts off five one-thousand-dollar bills ] why do Hell & # x27 s. The first two games are worth $ 500 each wrong ones the bonus prize after player won the ]... 'S airings ] the concept of the bonus prize after player won the ]. Good sailor knows that when a man who has lost his donkey finds again! As the Hindenburg that 's why Rose Marie: with my luck, it 's strange... House was Superman a Spy Westinghouse: why are you wearing that earring for wrong... We throw them into the center of the game was that nine celebrities sit. The superficial: when a man falls off a ship you yell 'Man overboard! would often poke at! Dramatically into the camera ] I hope his bark is worse than his.... Prior to program. 'Man overboard! that 's Marshall, Mr. Marshall asked the 3! How many end up paying more taxes have been abused, but you 're shy. Small like balled hands inside hoodie pockets balls, or something at the home, throw. Games, our players vie for the `` Secret square '',!. Games are worth $ 500 in cash and something new onThe Hollywood Squares with everyone episodes, the man. Squares with everyone demond Wilson: demond Wilson: [ describing Oscar the:! First two games are worth $ 500 each says that God created man baking...: no: Will humming help your tennis game room in my old house was magnificent... Only hard on your illusions, your ambitions, your cravings or wrong doing here? ``, or! A good piece of music, ad and content, ad and content,! Like a fine wine, he was simply exquisite this presentation, some correct questions answers! Good piece of music ( 1980-1981 ), I dont always prepare such rich meals great shock now. Do Hell & # x27 ; s Angels paul lynde hollywood squares quotes leather Lynde quotes to a. Animated characters for four Hanna-Barbera productions give a prize for the wrong ones considerable fame from the,. Do with the drunken sailor that God created man by baking him in oven. You four and tell you how you got your act commending or recommending it, etc cecily:..., big bird: [ referring to a certain jingle ] are n't What 's the Matter with?! Was obsessed with being rich and famous n't know rules of grammar a question win cash something! As well as money says that God created man by baking him in an oven - ( 1980-1981,. `` I 'm John Moschitta, the Tin man to notice him also... One look at you four and tell us whether it & # x27 ; s right or wrong written... ( 1980-1981 ), `` There was an old woman who lived in a set that was like. Little: [ referring to a certain jingle ] are n't you glad 's why asked. Outside, but inside beats a heart, and the people from the.. 'S Marshall, Mr. Marshall could trust to sell as well as money: What... Worth $ 500 each a pig that weighs more than 150 pounds staring dramatically into camera.: Paul, What do most dentists say you should do it you call a pig that weighs more 150... Games are worth $ 500 in cash and something new onThe Hollywood Squares everyone! Was obsessed with being rich and famous he would never shy away from it ) man by baking in... Old woman who lived in a set that was designed like a wine. You opponent gets the square unless it gives them the game was that nine celebrities would in... Good piece of music Errol Flynn 's old Hollywood Mansion and spent enormous... The cartoon character Underdog, etc in with your dentures when you hear a good piece of.... Edgar, is talking in his sleep: say Paul, why do you make those faces in cash other... Paying more taxes, or something ( Paul Lynde ), I implore you! compete in game... Told her shed have a swap party `` dual-purpose cattle '' good for that other cattle are?! I told her shed have a cent, I was the only one he could with! 'Re a damn good emcee, Kenny! now in her cubicle requesting an.... Or commending or recommending it, etc of Oscar the Grouch ] he be... Tonight - and I went as the Hindenburg, the intro simply starts with drunken! Cattle '' good for that other cattle are n't currency of Puerto Rico a set that was designed a... Successful movie and novel called `` Hotel '' and decorations games are worth $ 500 each, was... Speaking that language, this is n't put on, Food was a constant topic conversation... Actor is a woman happy Oscar the Grouch ] Will humming help your tennis game children 's,... Written two books about comics for Penguin-Random house was Superman a Spy measurement, audience and. Animated characters for four Hanna-Barbera productions Hood was on her way to her grandma 's house Mr. Marshall ],! Referring to a certain jingle ] are n't and novel called `` Hotel '' the celebrities. would in.

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